25
Aug
09

“the dialup” and: waiting to surf

i’ve actually come to embrace my lousy er- loud internet surfing board. it’s homey. while all of you are probably surfing five to six waves at once, while listening to still downloading music: the hip and the pop- i am taking my sweet time (-5bp), and rather enjoying it. see- as i see it, you can’t just spring up five to six waves to surf from out of the blue… it isn’t natural. my brainchild al gore would certainly not approve. no, the waves aught to be welcomed at first, spotted from afar, have gathered a croud around you to see the wave’s progress (+5bp), spoken to (+5bp), sung to (+10bp), begged to (-5bp)- “hurry up you infernal wave!” -and again begged to (-10bp), fed, refreshed (-10bp), and given your fullest attention (+7bp). no downloading the lime wire or burning the track is recomended by any means (-10bp). this would almost certainly slow the wave to even lesser of a crawl… but uh, i insist- the longer you await the wave to come, the more satisfying it is to surf (+10bp), and the more irritating it is to read “page could not be found.” after twelve minutes waiting to watch the 9 comercial with the ragdoll and the robot… those are twelve minutes i won’t soon get back (-12bp).

“the dialup” brownie points: -15!

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3 Responses to ““the dialup” and: waiting to surf”


  1. 1 Jacob
    August 25, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    ahh your pain is massive
    it makes me like my crappy computer
    I just watched five music videos simultainously while playing a game and listening to itunes

    why do all this at once…. because i can, and i take my internet forgranted
    thanks for the awakening

  2. 2 mattack86
    August 25, 2009 at 6:13 pm

    Here’s, Matt is leaving a comment at 10 megs a second.

  3. 3 cjrivers
    September 1, 2009 at 1:01 pm

    My internet has been so slow lately, it’s like I’m using dial-up again.

    Crazy how when a website doesn’t load in 2 seconds or less, we say our computer is going “slow”! We have become a society of instant gratification!


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